11/26/08

another wednesday

it's the day before thanksgiving, and my break has begun. it was a cloudy morning, as i walked to school. i haven't been well lately, and wondered if i could/should use that as an excuse to start my thanksgiving break early... but class was not to be missed, i decided. good decision. the roads were emptier than usual, and the birds still chirped. i attempted to keep my pace constant as i walked, uphill and down. the walk is beautiful, and one encounters all kinds of people/things as one walks. there are varied stimuli that attract us, some perhaps that repel - can we keep our pace steady in light of each of these? this was my point of focus for those 20-25 minutes. it was a rewarding exercise, and offered its own insights toward the effort to treat life with just that equanimity.

the walk back was even more pleasant. the illness didn't matter, in fact it was much improved. it was raining as i got out of south hall, and i was surprised to learn that my umbrella was on me. the umbrella did happen to be red-and-white, and as i sheepishly carried it (thankful it wasn't big game week anymore), the self-consciousness attracted my attention to the abundant variety of umbrellas around. the proliferation of green, the leaves on the ground, the cobbled paths wet and cleaned - all these sights were brilliant and rejuvenating (are there no limits to rejuvenation, i wonder?). as i tend to on some of my more cherished walks, i let the air 'go through' me. it was blissful.

but what is it that brings about that blissfulness? why does nature enthrall me so? why do i find such joy in the cracks on the pavement, in the water that flows through the creek, in the trees that are stripped clean of their leaves, in the grandeur of the campanile, the wetness of the streets? why must my heart sing with joy as i walk through this campus, on these roads? why is there such joy to be found in the colors of the varied umbrellas? what is it, really? perhaps it is this oneness with the world that makes every encounter joyful... but that's a mere guess, i'm not really sure. thoughts, again, would be welcome. when i have a better answer, i will write in.

must get on with my life now - there are showers to be had - but i am oh, so thankful for the extended four i moments i was blessed with today. i'm just not sure where they come from, entirely....

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