man, what a mission!

day 0:

although the conference started today, i was at the venue yesterday morning - trying to get a table/booth/wall/anything to display the millee poster. the technology pavilion was quite small - housing not more than 20 booths in all. there was an entrance to a common area (where food was to be served, and there was some seating space) and beyond that was a fairly large auditorium, where the panel discussions were to take place. i was with anuva (one of my closest friends of 15 years), who was in charge of the tcs booth (very fancy, that). in contrast, the qualcomm booth was such an eyesore, gosh. it was huge - artifically raised on a platform that had grass artificially planted into it. there were artificial beams with several lights on it (you know - the kind that hide in the ceiling). why lights, when the event was to be held from 11 to 6 in the day, i do not know! then there were two plasma screens. of course, the light was strong enough that one could not see anything on the screens either. but who cares, i guess.

i waited for ms. gangavidya (the event organizer) to show up, so i could get a space. unfortunately, after keeping me waiting for an hour she did a no-show. first, told me to find another mr. senthil kumaran, then to find another soul. no one was wearing name tags, how was i to know? i went inside the convention center asking around for a senthil kumaran, and they told me to go to the av section. the av section of the convention center, that is, which - incidentally - happened to be quite a distance from the convention center. of course, i had to first go to the convention center from one entrance, do a full circle, exit from another door, go round the building, and come back to the place where i started. all in search of the darned elusive senthil kumaran. i was simultaneously calling qualcomm to know if i could be hosted by their booth - for they had this very convenient spot that read "education" and "wireless reach program". of course, not like calling qualcomm was an easy task. after many failed attempts at calling arif khan, whose contact number had been generously shared with me by anuva (thank you, anuva!), i asked the guy working at setting up the booth to get me in touch with the in-charge. i was put in touch with a shekhar kapur, who, apparently, doesn't even work for qualcomm! but how was i to know - i asked him if i could put up a poster, he said that was fine. i said it was a 20x30 rolled-up poster. he said they'd even mount it for me. what could be better, i had gotten my work done. yipppeeee! or so i thought...

i finally heard back from arif when i was way on my way to the airport (to meet anuj t.). he said shekhar kapur was only a contractor setting up the booth and had no authority to allow me to set up shop there. he wasn't rude or anything, but said it didn't make sense for them to host me at their booth. after some to-fro, he said he'd talk to linda - who was down in delhi from san diego.

very soon, linda called me and asked if millee was under john canny. i thought i was on the road to success, finally... yippeeee! or so i thought! she said that tcs were the grand prize winners at the competition, and that they were going to be there at the pavilion, and that it would be weird for us to be hosted there if tcs wasn't. um, ok. i tried a different card then - i told her i had run into tcs at the venue that day ("run into"... not really, since anuva and i went together) and that they were ok with us being at the qualcomm booth while they had a separate booth of their own. (it made sense, anyway, since tcs had the largest booth finally - with huge banners, and things, but anuva hadn't really said this to me - in those words. but what's the point of being friends for 15 years if you can't throw one's name around thus ;) anyway, i thought it was all sorted out then. later, however, arif called again to say he had made other arrangements. i was so tired by then i said ok and that i'd deal with it tomorrow (now today).

of course, more to mention - gangavidya said today there would be high security because the president of india was attending, and so i would not be allowed any brochures or cell phones. ahem. i had to beg for permission to carry a cell phone. and had to resort to printing visiting-card-like information cards because they were not going to allow anything else. of course, i have never printed visiting cards before, but am now an expert - so there, i learned something new.

that, i think, sums up the day. now to -

day 1:

i get there on my own today, losing my way along the way... the venue is an hour from home, and the road (for about a mile) to the ignou campus (the venue) is rocky as hell. there was lots of finding-the-right-person, calling-everyone-incessantly, etc. going on for a while. i spoke to 4 new people at the qualcomm booth, since none of arif/linda/shekhar-kapur were there. no one knew what to do with me or my poster. and they all had different suggestions. one wanted to put the poster center-stage, one wanted to put it at the very darkest corner of the stall where it had negative visibility (seriously!), one said i should go find gangavidya, one set about to find a table... anyway, in the end i had no table. because ms. gangavidya was eating price... tons of it. she didn't pick up my phone once, and i called eight times. she didn't answer the qualcomm guy's either. none of the security guards could find her. what kind of event coordinator disappears from the scene on the day of the event? gosh.

since i had little to do then but wait, and anuva had tons, i walked around talking to everyone in every booth individually. not all booths were fully present today, but i talked to some folks about their applications. it was an exercise in social skills. but thank goodness, i passed with flying colours (self-proclaimedly of course). i learned about some products made by tcs, hcl, tata tele-services, media labs asia, etc. and was quite glad to do so. then anuva grabbed me for a coffee and we headed to the pvr complex in saket. first, we ate more junk at mcd's (so much for my avoidance of mnc chains, etc.) and then drank coffee at barista. when we got back, we ran into parag and linda, and said hi. parag gave me his card and told me i must write to him, that he'd love to meet with us and discuss probable future courses. i said i'd get in touch with him (i still haven't, but give me a break - i will soon).

the first panel discussion had started by then, and we attended. anuva was soon bored though :) so she left early. i went out at the tea break, and found that the tea area was as crowded as the old-delhi railway station, and the tea was tea-bag tea. what the heck?! life is so unfair. i went around looking for arif, failed, then went back in to attend the second panel discussion.

by this time, most interestingly, it was pouring outside, and in the technology pavilion, not even the very funky glass ceiling was able to keep all of the rain out. there were 50 leaks in the ceiling, and every one had vacated their booths by 4, not to return for the day. ahem. what if it rains tomorrow? will cross that bridge once i get to it, i guess.

the second panel discussion was interesting, until it got interrupted to host mr. amar singh - the esteemed politician, dressed in his kurta-pyjama and sleeveless vest. (why do all netas dress like that? why? if i were male and a neta, i would wear a nice collar shirt and pants, and look around proudly!)

by then it was already 6 though, so i waited for a couple more presentations and decided to call it a day. i had been perhaps the only individual representative, and a day of un-success and alone-ness-in-motive was quite enough to take. i left at 6.30 and heaved a sigh of relief.

the day was not as unproductive as it deceptively appears. i did get to talk to a lot of people and did distribute some cards. and qualcomm expressed interest, didn't it? anyway, tomorrow (apparently) sheila dikshit is expected, and the media will arrive. which means, the booths will be full as well... or so we hope. more than anything, i am pleased to have attended the panel discussions. they were awesome - informative and educational. but the rural technology initiatives discussed will need to be penned later (since this has already become the longest post of all time).


(i fell asleep on the laptop as i typed the above, so it is already day 2, and it is raining outside. we shall see if anything materializes. but tell me, how can one not have arrangements to deal with rainfall at an event of such scale? beats me...)

aromatic pleasure

there is space to breathe
to learn
to grow
'tis all in the act
of letting go
of the self
of love
inhibitions unspoken
there is more to speak
when the ice
is broken
and when the door
is ajar
and the winds
are free
there is more to behold
more beauty
to see

"less is more"

i know what the phrase means to convey, and i kinda like the sound of it too, but don't you think it serves really to confuse? what does "less is more" mean? the logician in me concludes that "less = more" in which case "less than = more than" and so on, so forth.

that doesn't work. and i'd really rather that people didn't use these sort of things in speech/writing.

on the other hand, there's the aesthetician (if there's such a word, which there isn't since it just got a red squiggly under it but you know what i mean) in me that simply loves it, and uses it every chance it gets. and you can take it one further and establish transitivity with a "and more is less" addition.

crazy english-speakers. i bet it was the americans who coined it. has got to be.

i am back again :)

from lucknow. oh, so happy to be home, but oh, so sad to leave millee.

i was going to write something, and now i've completely forgotten what it was. so i'll just stop now and write again tomorrow maybe.

nighty night.

from lucknow

it's 3.43am, and maybe i should sleep. it's raining outside and there is finally internet in the house, so i resist for a little while longer.

as for the last few days, they've been ultra-amazing - getting to know good people, and having a marvelous time. the learning never ends. the work (and it truly runs round the clock) is undoubtedly fun and interesting, and there is always something interesting to do - always. (these days i've been very busy coming up with a million nicknames for my team-members.)

unfortunately, i don't know where to start to really give any details. am headed back to delhi (for the next 1.5 months) in a couple of days, and maybe then life will return to its normal net-fed state. and then when i'm back in the bay, things will really return to 'normalcy'. interestingly, there is a strictly inverse relationship between comfortable living and living reality...

just thought i'd say hi and wish you well.
i hope life's been treating you good.

overwhelmed

a couple days after leaving mysore, i just received a phone call from the kids. due to some unusual circumstances i had been unable to say bye to them, and they called to ask me how i was. there is little else that can be communicated on the phone, between people who do not speak a common language, barring a few sentences. (i will stop here on language, or i might never end. the last few days have seen a lot of thinking on that front - the benefits, the pitfalls of language, and i need more time for articulate expression.)

i am back to being overwhelmed. the little settling down i had done yesterday after getting here has now been undone. starting now, all over again.

meet the parents

yesterday, i was in bangalore, spending the night at p's place, getting to know her family, and therefore her, a little better. i was especially moved by the look and feel of their house. it was not just that it was beautiful, tastefully decorated, and pleasing to the eye. there was more to it - it was filled with light and warmth, but cool and airy at the same time. it was so cosy that i couldn't make up my mind where to sit, most of the time. but more than anything, it was perfectly representative of the people who lived there - friendly, cheerful, and endearing. the kind of house i would call a home the moment i stepped in. you know what i mean?

hmmm...

the previous post belongs to a different age, a different person - or so it seems. for continuity's sake - yes, the wedding happened, and it was much fun. you can tell from the photos on smugmug, can't you?

i am back from mysore. actually, i am back from bangalore, mysore, and perhaps most importantly - karekura. the trip involved a diverse set of experiences, all of which i cannot document now, not when i am still reeling. i will soon post more, perhaps on the more befitting blog, that has been starved of posts for a while. well it doesn't matter, either way. i will also post pictures, all in due time (though it will be a task to ascertain which pictures will make the mark - of the 1000s i have clicked).

meanwhile, please visit the millee blog. what is millee? find out for yourself.

bursting...

with excitement.

today is the wedding. yippee yayy!

please read

the following blog:
The Quest for Certitude

there's a lot this blog and i have in common, and definitely worth a read (if not several).

in the news

there was mention of a couple who had fallen in love but were unable to marry because they belonged to the same gotra. so they eloped, only to be put to death soon after by their relatives. in fact, they were fed pesticides, tied up, and thrown into the canal.

the news was not shocking, no, because one is no longer surprised to hear of tales that belong best to times long gone. still immensely tragic, is it not?


i have to admit i was not aware of what gotra meant, before i read this article, let alone know my own gotra. every day one learns something new. i am now on a mission to discover all my brothers and sisters across the world.

um... yeah...

a poem

i am not in the habit of posting poetry here. but there are feelings conveyed in this poem oh-so-beautifully. the imagery is exquisite, the pain is real. a delightful read in a sad sort of way.

To His Lost Lover
-Simon Armitage

Now they are no longer
any trouble to each other

he can turn things over, get down to that list
of things that never happened, all of the lost

unfinishable business.
For instance ... for instance,

how he never clipped and kept her hair, or drew a hairbrush
through that style of hers, and never knew how not to blush

at the fall of her name in close company.
How they never slept like buried cutlery -

two spoons or forks cupped perfectly together,
or made the most of heavy weather -

walked out into hard rain under sheet lightning,
or did the gears while the other was driving.

How he never raised his fingertips
to stop the segments of her lips

from breaking the news,
or tasted the fruit,

or picked for himself the pear of her heart,
or lifted her hand to where his own heart

was a small, dark, terrified bird
in her grip. Where it hurt.

Or said the right thing,
or put it in writing.

And never fled the black mile back to his house
before midnight, or coaxed another button of her blouse,

then another,
or knew her

favourite colour,
her taste, her flavour,

and never ran a bath or held a towel for her,
or soft-soaped her, or whipped her hair

into an ice-cream cornet or a beehive
of lather, or acted out of turn, or misbehaved

when he might have, or worked a comb
where no comb had been, or walked back home

through a black mile hugging a punctured heart,
where it hurt, where it hurt, or helped her hand

to his butterfly heart
in its two blue halves.

And never almost cried,
and never once described

an attack of the heart,
or under a silk shirt

nursed in his hand her breast,
her left, like a tear of flesh

wept by the heart,
where it hurts,

or brushed with his thumb the nut of her nipple,
or drank intoxicating liquors from her navel.

Or christened the Pole Star in her name,
or shielded the mask of her face like a flame,

a pilot light,
or stayed the night,

or steered her back to that house of his,
or said 'Don't ask me to say how it is

I like you.
I just might do.'

How he never figured out a fireproof plan,
or unravelled her hand, as if her hand

were a solid ball
of silver foil

and discovered a lifeline hiding inside it,
and measured the trace of his own alongside it.

But said some things and never meant them -
sweet nothings anybody could have mentioned.

And left unsaid some things he should have spoken,
about the heart, where it hurt exactly, and how often.

rumi

Come to the orchard in Spring.
There is light and wine, and sweethearts
in the pomegranate flowers.

If you do not come, these do not matter.
If you do come, these do not matter.

how darling!

in transit

i feel like i'm in transit right now. the next few days will be somewhat happening - what with g's wedding and a's visit, mom and dad leaving, getting ready for my trip to bangalore/mysore. life feels fairly stressful. and i only just recovered from my bby/goa tiredness.

stressful doesn't do a good job of representation though. more like - i actually need to do a few things in my day, rather than just lie around and work out/do yoga :). i guess the best thing to do is to look forward to all the new experiences life has in store for me in the coming weeks.

yippee yay!

(incidentally, this is one expression from my goa trip i will not forget. it sounds perfectly darling when it comes from a.)

i am back

but completely tired out from the travel. someday, i will be blogging again. for now - sweet dreams :).