boring?
a realization dawns - i seem to be on steady progress toward boredom. not my own boredom, by any means, (because life, as i see it, is too fulfilling to ever be boring) but the boredom of others. i am barely able to carry on an interesting conversation anymore, i cannot find reason in sticking to one stand in an argument, i'm less inclined to harbor any preferences (let alone state them), and most things i used to say earlier feel either unnecessary or just rather mindless. no part of me wishes to claim that i was a most interesting person to begin with :), but it is all relative after all, is it not? anyway, boring-ness may be an unfortunate (if that) side-effect of an otherwise wholly positive growth process, and i shall live with it.
10 comments:
Firstly, you're not boring.
Secondly, boring-ness is not a side-effect of positive growth.
Thirdly, I can totally relate to how you feel as I often feel that my words fail to interest others. But, how much of this is just a figment of our imaginations? How much of this is really just because of our own insecurities, feelings of unworthiness. Perhaps we are bored with what we're saying? or perhaps we're simply on a path towards integrating new ways of thinking and haven't quite worked out the right way of saying things but the old way no longer quite fits. Or maybe it's because we're failing to take risks in our vocal expression and are containing full use of voice/hands/facial animation to enliven what we say?
I'm generally not much good at keeping a captive audience of more than a couple people, but I think that has to do with a combination of the above mentioned factors. People who seem to do this well tend to be really excited and interested in what they're saying.
Also, I wonder how much of what we label "interesting" is a function of societal conditioning - are things commonly considered interesting really so? I'm reminded of the words of Juan Francisco Mora, one of the counselors who spoke at the Baha'i conference in LA, when he talked about how a lot of our conversations today border on the trivial.
So maybe what is perceived as boring by many is actually what matters more, and its only the state of society that makes one judge it as boring? Worth pondering...
bb:
1. as long as you don't find me boring, bff, i'm happy :).
2. i need to elaborate on this, and why i said it.
3. so here i'd like to reiterate that i am talking with respect to my earlier self, not in comparison to other people. there will always be people who are more or less boring than me, on any metric. in fact, i think this point you raise might be worth a post altogether :).
good point Nikhil!
nikhil - yes, societal conditioning is what this is about for the most part, i think. i find that a lot of trains of thought i would earlier entertain seem unnecessary. gossip about the lives of others seems unnecessary, and any negative thoughts about people are completely out the window. this may make for less 'interesting' conversation sometimes, when i am tempted to smile in agreement or even smile in disagreement most times, and don't feel any desire to assert my stance energetically. but as i said, i will elaborate in a post.
Ya, gossiping about others is an interesting thing, because in society we do it all the time - and over time I find myself less tolerant to listening to people backbite about others. And once u start noticing, its amazing to realize how often we do that. And i dont know that i've found the ideal way to get out of such a situation yet, when someone is backbiting about someone else - or how to direct the discussion in a more positive way.
"That seeker should also regard backbiting as grievous error, and keep himself aloof from its dominion, inasmuch as backbiting quencheth the light of the heart, and extinguisheth the life of the soul." -- Baha'u'llah, Kitab-i-Iqan
posted another post on this topic. i wonder if my point is clear yet :), but what i mean is that it doesn't at all matter if i am more 'boring' from a societal standpoint. the more important thing is for trivial issues to slowly leave my speech, and for positivity to prevail. everything else comes second.
as for talking in 'populistic' ways, taking a stand and sticking to it no matter what, thus generating greater and animated discussions, finding one topic after another to expound over... all feels unnecessary and only seems to take away from the growth of the spirit. but you know what i mean :).
When on the path of "realization", how does one even define "boring", or "interesting" for that matter?
true, when seeking "truth", one should not be bothered by such subjective judgments as "boring" or "interesting". The truth is neither boring nor interesting - it just is... :)
Having said that, I think here the discussion was more related to what society commonly perceives as "boring" or "interesting" nowadays; and which of those categories the things that matter fit into.
nishant - indeed, there is no room for 'judgments' on this path. there is no such thing as boring or interesting, there is nothing lovable or hateworthy... as nikhil says, the truth just is. but it is 'interesting' to step out of oneself for a second, and look at us the way the world may :). food for thought, that is all. also trivial, entirely. but sometimes trivial digressions offer direction in some way, right? by helping us realize that these things are really not consequential?
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