deja vu
back at stanford. 'new' graduate student. re-settling into that same old routine. driving around ayrshire lane last night as i looked for a parking spot, i was reminded of many nights spent in the search of parking near home. also of hesitating to drive out because it meant coming back home and looking for parking again, then not being able to find any and walking a long way home. walking on the cool grass from the laundry room to my house reminded me of many evenings spent doing just that. a while ago when i was a resident at angell court. i am sure that next week will overwhelm me further, once classes begin.
my insides seem to be begging for more time to adjust to the changing environment. there is hardly time to catch up with the changes outside, when i still contend with the changes within. why do people ask me how my 'trip' was? it wasn't a trip, it was a journey. almost a process - of discovering - my surroundings and myself. i was gone for 3 months, but the sheer richness of my experiences leaves me convinced that time cannot be measured in hours and days alone. i must've been away for a year, maybe more. really.
when i am asked what i did in india, i have no answers. there is no short answer. the myriad experiences are too hard to list. i could go on a milestone basis - jet lag, idiscoveri, goa/bombay, wedding, bangalore, mysore, delhi again, lucknow, mission 2007, nucleus, mom's return, viral fever, fashion designing - and while some encompass too little and some all too much, i cannot possibly dive into any of these in a conversation that must end in, well, less than a day.
and back to stanford. today p and i went out to purchase my (most expensive) parking permit. came back so that p could take a nap before we leave again to do some extensive grocery shopping for the house. no, for home.
home. what a delightfully loaded word. in a mention, it puts one's heart and head at ease. in a mention, all is familiar, all serene. i love "home". i love home... 101.3 plays all over again, reminding me of days of yore - lying in bed with the radio on, and feeling a thrill run inside when the 'right' songs came on. what defines 'right'? who knows. one of life's mysteries.
today, we'd like to have the kitchen all set up and beautiful, so we can start cooking right away. enough of sandwiches and burgers, i need some good solid indian home-cooked food inside me.
i think i'm done rambling.
my insides seem to be begging for more time to adjust to the changing environment. there is hardly time to catch up with the changes outside, when i still contend with the changes within. why do people ask me how my 'trip' was? it wasn't a trip, it was a journey. almost a process - of discovering - my surroundings and myself. i was gone for 3 months, but the sheer richness of my experiences leaves me convinced that time cannot be measured in hours and days alone. i must've been away for a year, maybe more. really.
when i am asked what i did in india, i have no answers. there is no short answer. the myriad experiences are too hard to list. i could go on a milestone basis - jet lag, idiscoveri, goa/bombay, wedding, bangalore, mysore, delhi again, lucknow, mission 2007, nucleus, mom's return, viral fever, fashion designing - and while some encompass too little and some all too much, i cannot possibly dive into any of these in a conversation that must end in, well, less than a day.
and back to stanford. today p and i went out to purchase my (most expensive) parking permit. came back so that p could take a nap before we leave again to do some extensive grocery shopping for the house. no, for home.
home. what a delightfully loaded word. in a mention, it puts one's heart and head at ease. in a mention, all is familiar, all serene. i love "home". i love home... 101.3 plays all over again, reminding me of days of yore - lying in bed with the radio on, and feeling a thrill run inside when the 'right' songs came on. what defines 'right'? who knows. one of life's mysteries.
today, we'd like to have the kitchen all set up and beautiful, so we can start cooking right away. enough of sandwiches and burgers, i need some good solid indian home-cooked food inside me.
i think i'm done rambling.
4 comments:
I just realized why I like reading your blog so much.
There are some things which are there, but haven't been put into words - I mean, they don't even have a shape in my head. They are there - just there, intangible, hazy. But I see you putting words to them - and it is an "Aha!" moment for me. I have found many many of those in your blog. Today's example is - "lying in bed with the radio on, and feeling a thrill run inside when the 'right' songs came on. what defines 'right'? who knows. one of life's mysteries."
shruthi, you're too kind, and your words are beautiful. thank you!
i have a theory - beautiful words must come from beautiful people, yeah?
tsk tsk...modesty... :p
i try :).
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